I have been wanting to write this for a long time but I wanted to get to the end of my weight loss and have some better perspective than right in the thick of it. To start off I'll give some background of my weight and story.
I was always a skinny kid growing up. I never thought much about my weight or the food that I ate. Granted, we didn't eat out or have much sugar or baked goods available in our house. I don't think we necessarily ate very healthy at my home growing up but we also didn't have lots of sugar or snacks either. We ate what was affordable and could be stretched to feed lots of people and my mom tried her best to give us as balanced nutrition as she could with the very limited resources she had available. Food was like most things in our home, it was for utility and quantity, not for beauty or the best nourishment.
After getting married and having control over what was in the house for the first time and being able to eat whatever I wanted, I gained 10lbs. I'm sure it was a combination of the stresses of major changes and the happiness of being married that led to the weight. I needed the extra pounds so it was something I celebrated and I felt robust and healthy. When I got pregnant with our first child, I worked really hard to gain the weight I needed to and I was so proud of my accomplishment! After her birth, I was down to prepregnancy weight within a month. I was astonished! "That was easy!" , I thought. Then a few weeks later my Dad unexpectedly passed away. The shock and stress that followed wreaked havoc to my body, hormones, and emotions and within a few months I had gained back every pound of my pregnancy weight. I had never thought I was an emotional eater before, but I seemed to become one after my Dad's death.
We had a few major changes all close together that didn't do me any favors. I had my first baby and all that comes with that, my Dad passed away suddenly and my entire world crashed, and then a few months later we moved to Montana to a new job, town, and culture that I didn't know. All these major and sudden changes did not set well with my body. I had little resources or knowledge to know how to deal with this and I did not have the mental and emotional space to tackle it. Fast forward another couple moves and some more changes and I started getting more and more interested in health and food. Not in a trend or fad but just in eating basic staple foods. I found a source for raw milk, pantry staples, reliable fruits and veggies, fresh eggs, and meat. We were eating better and more nutritiously than ever. I began cutting out things I knew didn't sit as well for us like pastas and breads. I learned how to make sourdough. We had chickens and goats and calves and I had lots of outdoor chores to do and it made me more active than I had been since having children. I felt healthy, probably the best I had ever felt up to that point. During this time I got pregnant with my second child. I recovered quickly after his birth (I'm unsure of my weight at the time since we didn't have a scale) and I felt very wonderful. Strong and healthy.
We moved to town and sold our animals when we bought our first house - a tiny 1 bedroom home on a double lot in town that captured my heart and is still to this day one of my favorite homes we've lived in. My son ended up being a very challenging baby and he couldn't handle any dairy at all which meant that I had to be incredibly careful about what I ate as he was nursing. Some days I felt like I could only eat grass. I lost weight because of the major food restrictions, and being so rural, we had very few alternatives to dairy products. When he weaned and I could eat whatever I wanted to again, I gained a lot of my weight back. It wasn't something I thought a whole lot about or even knew what to do about it. My weight wasn't something I fixated on. Some times I thought about losing weight but I also knew I was not going to workout like crazy (I hate working out) and I wasn't going to do some crash diet either. Then we had another major move to the other side of the state which ended up being very disorienting to me and apparently I tend to eat more when I'm stressed. I gained quite a bit during that year that we lived in Bozeman in an apartment. At the end of the year we decided to move to West Virginia to run our own business and be close to family. I was pregnant with our 3rd child and the heaviest I had been up until that point.
Moving to West Virginia took a major toll on my health. I think I ate more carbs and sugar than I had in my entire life. There were lots of potlucks and get togethers with yummy food that were absolutely fattening. The stress of the move, the change in climate, the stress of extended family, our own business, and living on minimum wage as a family created the perfect storm. I had $200/month for food which meant I had to rely on cheap carbs like bread and pasta to stretch our dollars. We skimped on meat and veggies. I baked a lot of sweet treats and we ate a lot of fattening foods. I ballooned. It's like most things, it wasn't any one thing but a lot of things combined. After having our 3rd child, I did not lose weight like I had with the others. I was my heaviest weight (not pregnant) that I had ever been and I felt it. It was the first time that I really felt uncomfortable in my own skin. I didn't carry the weight well and it was one more thing that felt out of my control and I had no idea what to do about it. I didn't even recognize my body anymore. It was very hard on me.
Fast forward to now and we've had a few more major moves and life changes and lots of stressful things. Last year after moving here I began one by one to tackle things that I wanted to change and weren't lining up with my priorities. I started with my smartphone. You all probably read those posts. That started a whole avalanche of change in my life for the better. I started reading more and taking time to really enjoy and invest in my life and home and thoughts more than I had in years. Really invest. Having the space to just think my own thoughts and untangle the whirlwind of change that happened both in my own life and in the world over the last several years was incredibly helpful. I also focused on rest more than I ever had. I started going to bed earlier and waking up refreshed instead of groggy. I wasn't on my phone until I dropped asleep or looking at it first thing in the morning. It was transformational. I don't think I've felt so rested since I started having children. Ever since we moved here I've been taking small actionable steps towards goals and changes I wanted to see in my life. This year I had quite a few goals that I wanted to work on at the start of the year and I broke them down by month so that I would focus on one thing a month and the next month I would layer the next thing on top and continue throughout the year. I had decided that this year I was going to do something about my weight. I wasn't sure what but I was committed to finding something and sticking to it. I was not willing to end the year weighing what I weighed at the start of the year.
February was the month that I had assigned to starting something - anything, to lose weight. I went through most of the month unsure of where to look or how to start. I knew doing an intense workout routine was not something I was going to stick to. I also didn't want to do a diet as those never resonated with me and I greatly doubted the longevity of the change when diets are used. I have friends who have done whole30, Trim Healthy Mama, Keto, workout programs, Weight Watchers, Atkins, or hired health coaches. All of them have seen results and I think that if you are consistent with whatever method you decide on, you'll probably see results. It's just that none of those seemed like a fit for what I was looking for. I didn't want to do some program and I didn't want something I had to pay for or buy a bunch of products or spend a bunch of time figuring out "the plan" or changing a ton of how I cooked and buying a bunch of new ingredients. Is that too much to ask?! It seemed it was and so for a long time I had told myself that I probably just didn't want to lose the weight that bad since I wasn't willing to "do what it took." None of those plans/diets I researched ever resonated with me and I knew that if it didn't resonate then I probably wouldn't stick with it.
Towards the end of February I came across a video (I'll link it below) by sheer coincidence. It changed my life. I loved how the lady had simple but actionable steps. I like simplicity and feel like simple is sustainable and that was what I was looking for. It wasn't selling some coaching or product. The changes she suggested were small and doable. It was what I was looking for and all of a sudden weightloss went from this complicated, unachievable thing to simple and straightforward. I never knew it could be that simple! I started on her suggestions right away and then layered each one as I made them a habit. It didn't all happen at once but I started seeing progress right away. It was incredibly exhilarating. Here I had spent all these years feeling victimized by my weight and not knowing what to do about it, and the answer was so simple!
1. One of her first suggestions was to listen to your body. I knew already that lots of dairy, breads, and pastas leave me feeling bloated and not very good so I started by greatly reducing them. We still eat dairy but much less than we had been before. I bought almond milk to put in my coffee in the mornings instead of regular milk or coffee creamer. I also switched out sugar for Truvia and found sugar free coffee syrups to flavor coffee.
2. The next suggestion was watching calories and tracking your food. I had never really heard of that before. I had heard about counting calories but it was always in the negative view of eating disorders and I had never paid attention to calories ever. She suggested the free app called MyFitnessPal and I downloaded it that day and began to track my food. I was astonished! The first breakfast I tracked was almost 700 calories which was over half of my amount of calories I was supposed to eat in a day in order to lose weight according to MyFitnessPal! I was so shocked and it made sense why I had been gaining weight over the years because I literally had no idea how much I was overeating by sheer ignorance. I started tracking everything I ate and it helped pinpoint what worked for my body and also kept me accountable. I knew exactly what I was eating and how many calories instead of just mindlessly eating whatever was in front of me. It gave me parameters and helped me stay on track. I didn't cut any food group out so I never felt like I "failed" or fell off if I ate a dessert or ate at other people's homes. I learned more about portion sizes and it was all so incredibly empowering to watch it all work. This method clicked for me because it was like budgeting - only for food. I could eat that dessert if I wanted to but I would eat a big salad for lunch instead of something heavier so I had the "budget" for a dessert later. I also found that I mostly lost my taste for sweets and they weren't something that I craved anymore. I still have something occasionally but I do not crave the sugar like I used to.
3. She suggested going meatless or doing vegan challenges which I did not do. I know meat is higher calorie but I do well on higher protein and it wasn't something I was going to cut out. She explains and talks about sugar and that was really good. I have continued to learn about sugar from other sources and what it does in the body and that has been super eye opening. I still use sugar in some things but it has been so good to learn more about how our bodies metabolize things and how much sugar our body can actually process.
4. She talks about drinks and specifically drinking water. That was really good! Obviously we all know we should drink more water. It's like the standard suggestion, right? Drink more water! Most of us know we are chronically dehydrated. Drinking enough water was something I have always had trouble with. It's not that I drank other drinks either. I just didn't drink tons of liquids. I don't think I ever remember getting the standard 8 glasses of water down a day. Last year I printed a water tracker off and tried to increase my water intake by tracking it. I always fell horribly short. It seemed I just could not down that much fluid in a day. I started trying to tackle my water intake and drinking water when I felt hungry and knew I wasn't. I slowly started increasing my water intake. It was amazing the effects in my body! Another thing I noticed was that my weightloss was directly related to how much water I drank. All of a sudden I had a "why" behind drinking more water and not just a "I should drink more water because everyone says to drink more water." I started seeing why it was so important and how it helped my body function properly. That made it easier to drink more water at the beginning and soon it became a habit and not a chore I had to make myself do.
These were all transformational steps for me. Rest, water, tracking calories and being aware of what I was eating, and listening to my body. These are the things that were incredibly helpful for me. I cannot stress how important getting enough rest and water is for your body. I have seen such a huge transformation. My weight loss has been directly linked to both of these.
I have not done any workout routine during this time or any extra activity to lose weight. I did not buy a whole bunch of products either. I switched my sugar in my coffee out for Truvia and got sugar free coffee syrups which make wonderful homemade coffees. I have found lower calorie options for things we enjoy eating. Overall, we haven't had a major overhaul in our eating other than increasing the meat and veggies and decreasing the dairy and breads/pasta. It has been a simple and slow process that is sustainable and not restrictive. I feel full and satisfied and vibrant. I have not felt restricted or deprived in any way throughout this journey which was something I was afraid of.
A year ago at my heaviest weight. Size large top, size 12 bottoms.
After 5 months. Size Medium top and size 4 jeans.
I have lost almost 40lbs in the 5 months since I started this journey. I am still floored that it has worked and that I was actually able to lose weight. I think I spent a long time feeling like weight loss was super complicated or expensive. It kept me from starting because it felt so overwhelming. I wish I'd known years ago that it would have been this simple. I think I was looking for some magic solution and it turns out the solution for me was rest, water, awareness, and consistency.
I am not a doctor or dietitian and I don't know if this approach would work for everyone. I understand that there can be other factors for weight gain or inability to lose weight. I simply share this because I really wish I had known this years ago. I wish I had known it could be so simple. Sometimes the simplest things can be the hardest to do because they don't feel hard enough or like they will move the needle. However, I am a huge believer that the simplest things are usually the best things. It turns out that could be applied to weight loss, too.
This is the Youtube video I watched.